Sunday, July 24, 2005

mr. mcmurphy, would you like to share your thoughts?

Two days after being declared fit to receive a law degree by the faculty and administration at Texas Tech University, it came time to embark upon a mission to prove to the Supreme Court of the State of Texas that said law degree is worthy consideration for a license to practice law.

May, June, and most of July have come and gone, and the mission begun on May 16, 2005 will end on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday of this week. I hope my efforts bear fruit.

To earn a license to practice law, you must prove to the Texas Supreme Court that you know, inter alia, the following things:

1. That any party in a civil or criminal case is entitled to 45 days notice before a hearing on the issue of venue is held;
2. That the Common Law Rule Against Perpetuities has been modified by the cy pres doctrine, as amended by statute;
3. That the tort judgment creditors may reach not only the joint management community property of both spouses, but also the sole management community property of the nontortfeasor spouse;
4. That Battery, Rape, Kidnapping, and False Imprisonment are general intent crimes;
5. That a valid deed must be signed by the grantor, in writing, describing the land to be conveyed, with a present intent to convey the land;

The bar exam wouldn’t be so bad, but that’s a list of about one-tenth of one percent of what might come up on the bar exam.

After seven years of higher education, it’s extremely difficult to take a test knowing that you don’t know everything that will be on it. You don’t get through seven years of school by taking the attitude that all you need is a “D+” to pass.

I’ve determined that, more than anything else, that last statement pretty much sums up why this has been so stressful.

Wish me luck and pray hard.

Thursday, July 21, 2005

babe, i've got you babe

The last month has been like a bad sequel to Groundhog Day, starring the great Bill Murray. You know the one – Murray wakes up every day to the shrill pop ramblings of a dead congressman. Wait, that’s macabre…

Nevertheless, each day for the last seven weeks, with the exception of July 4th weekend, I wake up at precisely 6:30 a.m., shower, go to 7-Eleven for coffee and a Clif Bar, drive to school, sit down in my carrel, study, go to lunch at 12:20, resume studying at 1:00, eat supper at 6:30, resume studying at 7:00, and go home between 9 and 10 p.m.

That, folks, is routine.

Fortunately, this whole mess ends soon, and at this time next week, a weeklong routine of couch potato-ing myself back to normal blood pressure will take effect. At last check, roommate, a medical student, took my blood pressure. 167/92. Not cool. Some golf and some exercise should fix that.

I really hope Andie McDowell starts following me around. Or Scarlett Johansson – even though she wasn’t in Groundhog Day, that would be sweet.

Wednesday, July 20, 2005

60 seconds? but i want it now!

An undeniable “Homer Simpson” attitude of impatience has swept through the halls of TechLaw over the last couple of days. Unquestionably, this is a good sign, meaning that we are starting to feel like we can handle the Bar Exam that starts a mere six days from now.

Yesterday, I had a gut feeling that, if given the test right now, I would probably pass it. But being a superstitious man, I’ll forego passing of judgment on that comment and I’ll continue studying 14 hours a day.

Still, I wish I could just take the test now and get it over with. Then I wouldn’t have to miss all the sports on TV this weekend. Skipping the British Open last weekend was the worst experience of the whole Bar Exam. In years past, British Open weekend has been reserved for a 48-hour ABC Wide World of Sports slash Golf Channel marathon.
I like to pretend I'm Tiger Woods while sitting on the couch eating potato chips and candy. It's almost like actually being on the course.

Monday, July 18, 2005

seasoning my w.o.k. and venting

I have accomplished my goal of putting each essay subject on the bar exam onto one 8 ½ X 11 piece of paper, front and back. The Wall of Knowledge, Texas Edition, is nearing completion. Yet I still can’t get any of these essays right to save my life. I really hope the bar examiners are nice people.

Some 1Ls have decided to study on the Third Floor today. Loudly. Don’t they realize that the world revolves around me and my preparations for the Bar Exam. The whole world is out to get me. Arrrgggghhhh!!!!!!

Friday, July 15, 2005

i promise not to auction off tattoo space on my noggin

In response to Hoover’s selfish overture, a post:

You know how the hotels in Tokyo are little more than oversized armoire drawers? See, e.g., Seinfeld, Episode 141, “The Checks”. Well, I’ve been living in a room not much bigger while studying for the bar exam – my carrel at school. And I’ve been accumulating cups. Right now I have two cups from Rosas, one from Wendys, one from Sonic, and one from 7-Eleven.

I believe these cups have some sort of intrinsic value, memorializing all the time I’ve spent up here. So I’m going to attempt to auction them off on ebay when this is all over, along with my BarBri books. I figure on getting at least $500.

Sunday, July 10, 2005

the times they are a changin'

I’ll be laying low for a couple weeks, as the Texas Bar Exam is now only a little more than fifteen days away. There’s a lot left to learn. I promise I’ll be back on July 29th with a full report. And hopefully very few exam-related posts after that. Latro.

Friday, July 08, 2005

h.g. wells couldn't write his way out of a wet paper bag

War of the Worlds is a pretty decent flick. The whole reason I like apocalyptic-themed movies has to do with the human reactions/responses to impending doom. This movie didn’t pull too many punches there.

Warning – Spoiler Alert Next Paragraph Only

However, the character of Tom Cruise’s teenage son almost ruined the movie for me. He desperately wants to fight the aliens he knows he can’t beat?! Then he appears, seemingly out of the ether, alive and reunited with his family at the end. Please.

*Sarcastic Headline Alert: I only wrote this post so I could write that headline. I just threw a gum wrapper like 10 feet, only semi folded. I have no witnesses, unfortunately.

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

video killed the radio star

I have never heard of the following musical groups:

110
Lil Kim
Pretty Ricky
M.I.A.
Bo Bice
Yin Yang Twins

I’m popping in the White Album now; time to start a Revolution, slowly.

Tuesday, July 05, 2005

hot water heaters and bar exams made easy

My mental state has become something of an oxymoron. The Texas Bar Exam Freakout Index right now hovers at the lowest level it’s been at since May, but that makes me anxious about whether my colleagues know something I don’t. Weird. It’s hard to chillax when few of your friends seem to have the same capacity for said chillaxation.

Nevertheless, that’s exactly what I did for the last two days. I played golf on Sunday morning with two other lawyers and an accountant. The lawyers told me to lighten up. I did so, and for the rest of the day I lounged around the Matriarchal household at Three Oh Two with my cousins. On Monday, I did nothing, except drive back to Lubbock. It was everything I thought it could be.

Welcome, Claudia Anne.

Friday, July 01, 2005

you got a fax machine on this parade float?

Seen on several bar examinees’ blogs this week:

Hey BarBri, where’s my graded practice essay?!

Ditto for me.

This weekend I’ll be taking my first ever “lawyer” vacation. Saturday through Monday, I’ll be studying in MJW’s law library in little-d instead of my customary digs at the TechLaw library. A round of golf, a family barbecue, and driving Her Honor’s 4th of July parade float will be worked in between practice Multistate questions.

Anyone who has spent their vacation with a lawyer has undoubtedly witnessed a futile attempt to escape the responsibilities of the law practice, e.g., taking cell-phone calls from clients on the beach and evenings spent in the business center at the Hilton.

In my family, all our summer vacations were, in reality, Continuing Legal Education junkets that MJW and Her Honor turned into weeklong work by day, play by night marathons. This was not a bad thing. It meant that while the Parents were working by day, LittleBro and I got to hang around, among other places, Disney World, Toronto, and South Padre Island largely unsupervised. Greatness indeed.

Gotta go now. Time to load up Revel Blue with some PMBR lecture CDs.