chapter one: literal answers to rhetorical questions

Today a colleague had the gall, the nerve, and yes, the veracity, to inform me that I'm not funny. Daft.

But just because I don't know how to tell a joke doesn't mean that I don't know what makes for a good one. So I'm going to write a book on, get this -- the science and art of humor.

No joke. Look for me on the bestseller list soon.